Psychology Jokes

Modern Psychoanalysis Simplified

• Jung: Wow, psychoanalysis sure is cool!
• Freud: It IS cool.
• Jung: Helpful, too. Gosh I can't wait to study this and help people. :)
• Freud: I like this kid, as he's pretty much agreeing with all of my theories. Say, how would a fresh face like yourself like to be my successor?
• Jung: Oh gosh, would I ever!
• Freud:
• Jung:
• Freud:
• Jung:
• Freud:
• Jung: Do we...uh...HAVE to do emphasize sex so much?
• Freud: What?
• Jung: Well, it's just...that seems awfully specific. I don't think everyone would be so subconsciously focused on sex all the time. Not to mention the whole penis envy thing? I don't think women actually think that. It's almost like it's coming from your-
• Freud: Get out.
• Jung: ...I'm sorry?
• Freud: Get the fuck out of my house, you no-good, backstabbing, filthy Jew and never come back.
• Jung:
• Jung:
• Jung:
• Philemon: So I heard you're studying the human psyche...